How to not die alone : the surprising science that will help you find love / Logan Ury.
Love, as the saying goes, make fools of us all. But behavioral scientist and dating coach Logan Ury wants to fix that. A lasting, loving relationship doesn't just happen. It's the result of a series of decisions: when to date, who to date, who to settle down with, if you should break up, and everything in between. Very often, we don't understand why we're making certain decisions, and that causes us to make mistakes. And our current dating environment-with its overwhelming amount of options and constant pressure to make the right choice-only makes those decisions harder. Logan studied psychology at Harvard and spent years researching relationships. Here, she explains expectations, emotions, and other invisible forces that drive our faulty decision-making. But awareness on its own doesn't lead to action. (Knowing you shouldn't date "bad boys" or "manic pixie dream girls" doesn't make them any less appealing.) You have to do something. And Logan shows you how. Each chapter focuses on a different decision, from the first date on, and includes big ideas from behavioral science, original research, hands-on exercises, and stories about people just like you, to help you find-and keep-love. You'll learn: -What's really holding you back in dating-it's not what you think (and how to overcome it) -How to meet people in real life (and how to not come off as creepy) -Why your current dating app filters won't find a great match (and how to fix them) -Why you should always go on a second date (unless you're getting serious serial killer vibes) -Why "The One" doesn't exist (but you'll find love anyway) ... and much more!
A lasting, loving relationship doesn't just happen. It's the result of a series of decisions: when to date, who to date, who to settle down with, if you should break up, and everything in between. Our current dating environment, with its overwhelming amount of options and constant pressure to make the right choice, only makes those decisions harder. Ury spent years researching relationships, and here explains expectations, emotions, and other invisible forces that drive our faulty decision-making. You have to do something. And Ury shows you how. - adapted from info provided
Record details
- ISBN: 9781982120627
- ISBN: 1982120622
- ISBN: 9781982120634
- ISBN: 1982120630
- Physical Description: 335 pages : illustrations ; 24 cm
- Publisher: New York : Simon & Schuster, 2021.
- Copyright: ©2021
Content descriptions
General Note: | Publisher, publishing date and paging may vary. |
Bibliography, etc. Note: | Includes bibliographical references (pages 319-335). |
Formatted Contents Note: | Introduction -- Getting ready. Why dating is harder now than ever before ; The three dating tendencies ; Disney lied to us ; Don't let perfect be the enemy of great ; Don't wait, date ; Learn your attachment style ; Look for a life partner, not a prom date -- Getting out there. You think you know what you want, but you're wrong ; Meet people IRL (In Real Life) ; This is a date, not a job interview ; F**k the spark ; Go on the second date -- Getting serious. Decide, don't slide ; Stop hitching and stop ditching ; Make a breakup plan ; Reframe your breakup as a gain, not a loss ; Before you tie the knot, do this ; Intentional love. |
Search for related items by subject
Subject: | Dating (Social customs) > Psychological aspects. Interpersonal relations > Psychological aspects. Intimacy (Psychology) |
Genre: | Self-help publications. |
Available copies
- 1 of 1 copy available at Missouri Evergreen. (Show)
- 1 of 1 copy available at Cass County.
Holds
- 0 current holds with 1 total copy.
Show Only Available Copies
Location | Call Number / Copy Notes | Barcode | Shelving Location | Status | Due Date |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Cass County Library-Harrisonville | 306.73 URY 2022 (Text) | 0002205362888 | Adult Non-Fiction | Available | - |
How to Not Die Alone : The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love
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Table of Contents
How to Not Die Alone : The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love
Section | Section Description | Page Number |
---|---|---|
Author's Note | p. ix | |
Introduction | p. 1 | |
Section 1 | Getting Ready | |
Chapter 1 | Why Dating Is Harder Now Than Ever Before | |
How to Understand the Challenges of Modern Dating | p. 9 | |
Chapter 2 | The Three Dating Tendencies | |
How to Discover Your Dating Blind Spots | p. 17 | |
Chapter 3 | Disney Lied to Us | |
How to Overcome the Romanticizer Tendency | p. 23 | |
Chapter 4 | Don't Let Perfect Be the Enemy of Great | |
How to Overcome the Maximizer Tendency | p. 37 | |
Chapter 5 | Don't Wait, Date | |
How to Overcome the Hesitater Tendency | p. 49 | |
Chapter 6 | Learn Your Attachment Style | |
How to Manage Your Attachment Style | p. 65 | |
Chapter 7 | Look for a Life Partner, Not a Prom Date | |
How to Focus on What Matters in a Long-Term Partner | p. 75 | |
Section 2 | Getting Out There | |
Chapter 8 | You Think You Know What You Want, but You're Wrong | |
How to Avoid the Pitfalls of Online Dating | p. 105 | |
Chapter 9 | Meet People IRL (In Real Life) How to Find Love off the Dating Apps | p. 131 |
Chapter 10 | This Is a Date, Not a Job Interview | |
How to Create Better Dates | p. 149 | |
Chapter 11 | F**k the Spark | |
How to Reject Myths About Instant Chemistry | p. 171 | |
Chapter 12 | Go on the Second Date | |
How to Decide if You Should See Someone Again | p. 179 | |
Section 3 | Getting Serious | |
Chapter 13 | Decide, Don't Slide | |
How to Consciously Navigate Relationship Milestones | p. 199 | |
Chapter 14 | Stop Hitching and Stop Ditching | |
How to Decide if You Should Break Up | p. 211 | |
Chapter 15 | Make a Breakup Plan | |
How to Break Up with Someone | p. 231 | |
Chapter 16 | Reframe Your Breakup as a Gain, Not a Loss | |
How to Overcome Heartbreak | p. 251 | |
Chapter 17 | Before You Tie the Knot, Do This | |
How to Decide if You Should Get Married | p. 267 | |
Chapter 18 | Intentional love | |
How to Build Relationships That Last | p. 279 | |
Acknowledgments | p. 289 | |
Appendix | ||
Critical Conversation Planning Doc | p. 295 | |
Relationship Contract: Self-Reflection Worksheet | p. 299 | |
Relationship Contract | p. 305 | |
Notes | p. 319 |